Day 2 went nuts over glucose and sugars, and Day 3 went better with just a little bit of foginess and fatigue. But Day 4, OMG!
Day 4 I woke up with severe nausea, stomach cramps, zero appetite and severe fatigue. I had to call into work and spent the entire day laying in my chair and lurking back and forth to the kitchen and bathroom. I had no energy to even knit/crochet, put away laundry, or even watch Netflix. I don't remember the last time I felt so low and crappy. Although my sugars were regular, I still felt too sick to eat, so I think I managed one meal the whole day. My last attempt at food was some Malt-o-Meal around midnight - which only made things worse before finally trying to go to sleep.
Day 5 was just as bad - except I made myself go to work. I felt like I couldn't stay home again, so I gathered my strength and drove myself to work. But the nausea and fatigue followed me there. I have nausea medicine they sent home with me, but I can only take it once a day. Ugh I didn't move very fast, but with each piece of paper shuffled and filed I had the overwhelming urge to barf on everything. I think it's just sad when my biggest accomplishment is eating and apple with some peanut butter without wanting to throw it back up. Whoo!
Today is Day 6, and I actually woke up not nauseous! I have somewhat of an appetite today, but I'm worried about spooking it away. So far a bowl of cereal has triumphed!
I knew chemo would be hard and I knew it would make me feel like crap - although I have no idea for how long or how strong it will be. I can handle feeling like poop and handle feeling weak and useless at times. But I don't know if I can handle losing my love of food. If I can't eat and can't enjoy eating some of my favorite foods, I may just fall apart.
I feel like Kendra on The Cleveland Show when Donn threatened to slap the taste out of her mouth:
"Not the Taste!"
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